Mother’s Day is a week away and, while I hope you aren’t considering spending too much money on me there are definitely presents I don’t want.
I don’t want the latest Susan Boyle CD, nor do I want any CD with classical music, or remixes of love songs. I am 50 not 150.
I don’t want any form of potted plant, gardening implement or gnome for the flower beds. Not only do I hate gardening with a passion, we also do not have any flower beds. Not that you would notice.
I don’t want the latest kettle, toaster or other kitchen appliance. The ones we have do very well and I will not be happy if I’m reminded that I am the only one to venture into the kitchen.
I don’t want a bunch of flowers. They are beautiful for the first couple of days, but eventually I’m the one who has to clean up the dying petals and wash the vase of rotting water. Chocolates and wine, while thoughtful, are also things I can easily buy myself and I’m liable to get my favorite brands.
There are some presents that I would like this Mother’s Day.
I would like to have the TV to myself all day as well as being in command of the remote control all day.
I would like to have all three meals cooked for me and the resulting mess in the kitchen cleaned up.
I would like to have my car cleaned – inside and out.
That’s about all really. But if you do want to spend money on me, can I suggest the following:
• the complete series of Sex and the City
• the complete series of Boston Legal
• Alicia Key’s first album that I bought years ago and now can’t find
• a voucher for a car cleaning place
• two vouchers for a car cleaning place…